A New Foundation for Your Sober Life

Table of Contents

Houses built on sand will not stand for very long. They will certainly be unable to weather even the gentlest of storms. When we were in our disease we more or less set our foundation on sand.

Drugs, alcohol, and other destructive behaviors kept us from really setting down good roots in most areas of our lives. At the very least, we never learned how to deal with life, and we never learned how to survive the inevitable storms of life. We drank and used and floundered with the rest of existence.

Coming into recovery at Jaywalker Lodge, we are asked to put our trust in people and in things we may not totally understand. Even if we don’t understand it at first, these people and the program of recovery they bring to us are indeed the building blocks of a new, strong foundation.

Through the process of recovery and the 12-Steps, we can learn how to ground our lives in spiritual principles which will give us clear direction when all else is unclear. Building up a sober community around us gives us access to life lessons on how to stay sober, be useful to others, and find peace through even the hardest times of our lives. Likely, we will know someone who has experienced similar turmoil and remained sober – and they will gladly share their wisdom.

The peer-directed culture of Jaywalker Lodge creates an environment in which we build strong relationships and learn to embrace “common solutions” for the problems we share.

Often the biggest piece of advice they’ll stress is to continue working the 12-Steps of recovery, go to meetings, and be of service. The Big Book tells us outright that a program of recovery can provide us with “a design for living that really works.” The foundation of this new life is a triangle made of three sides – Unity, Service, and Recovery.


It is common that in our disease we were often alone, whether it was by choice or people had simply had enough of us. In recovery, we will find “our people” in a short time. We must allow ourselves to accept the love and companionship of the people we meet in recovery.

Those bonds will be indispensable to us. Not only will they teach us how to be good friends and how to live sober, but they will share our joys and sorrows. Their experience with living sober will be remarkably helpful to us as we trudge the road of happy destiny with them.

In turn, our experience and our company will be of great benefit to them as well. We will be able to help them and share in life’s up-and-downs in a beautiful sober friendship.

Unity can be an adjustment for most people, who are so used to being the “lone wolf” in their disease – but we don’t have to go it alone anymore. In fact, unity is one of the three sides of the triangle of recovery because it is vital to a life in recovery that is happy, joyous, and free.


Another side of the triangle is service. Service is usually an unfamiliar concept to most people new to sobriety. It is certainly something we were unlikely to follow in our disease.

The world often seemed like a harsh place in our sickness, and the good that was there was hard to see. In recovery, we quickly meet many people who are apparently bursting to be helpful to us.

We see Jaywalker Lodge volunteers and other people working for free, doing tasks to keep meetings running. We may ask ourselves why they do this. It’s because service is a key tenet of recovery. Without it, we may not find usefulness or joy for a full life in recovery.

Through service, we learn how to put another person’s needs ahead of our own. This begins to free us from the crippling and selfish domination of our own problems. Often our problems fill our minds, rendering us afraid and useless.

When we begin to shift our mind to helping others, we may soon find that the magnitude of our own problems is lessened – sometimes they even go away or somehow get solved. It may sound like magic, but it is a simple spiritual principle.

When we give to others, we also receive. When we help others, we are helped. It is often said in recovery that we must give it away to keep it. This is true, and service proves it. When we work the 12th-Step we will indeed get to see the greatest powers of service. As we carry the message to others in recovery, our lives and attitudes can transform in miraculous ways.


The third side of the triangle is recovery itself. Without this integral side, we likely could not experience unity and service. Likewise, recovery without unity and service might seem rather empty and incomplete.

Recovery happens when we begin to diligently work a 12-Step program, join the unity of fellowship, and be of great service to our fellows. It may seem rather straightforward: get sober, work the 12-Steps, and you have recovery. While this is true, it goes so far beyond that. As we work all three sides we find purpose, joy, and freedom in a life that continues to grow and become increasingly beautiful as we stay within that perfect shape of the triangle.

Any foundation built upon the firm grounding of recovery will be proven to withstand the storms of life. It can stand as a beacon of peace and growth. More than that, any life built upon such a foundation can be so full of love, joy, peace, and usefulness that it may even outdo your wildest dreams.

With a new and strong foundation, you can build the life you deserve. Jaywalker Lodge has the tools you need and a devoted team of professionals ready to teach you how to use them, many of whom are grateful participants in their own recovery from addiction. Experience the joy of building a new life with us. Call now at (866) 529-9255.

author avatar
Stefan Bate, MA, LAC, CCTP Chief Clinical Officer
Stefan Bate, BA, MA, LAC holds a Master's Degree in Applied Psychology from Regis University and is a Licensed Addiction Counselor in the state of Colorado. Stefan has wide-ranging experience in the field of addiction recovery including: working as a recovery coach, therapist, and program director.

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