Month: January 2021

Making Treatment Meaningful

making treatment meaningful

From the Jaywalker point of view, recovery treatment is about more than sobriety. Jaywalker Lodge gets its name from the parable of the Jaywalker in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. This story is a seemingly dramatic portrayal of a man who repeatedly jaywalks, despite his increasingly grievous physical injuries as a direct consequence of his jaywalking. Upon closer reflection, this is no different than someone who is an alcoholic or addict yet continues to drink and use despite their desire to stop. Understanding this vicious cycle of chronic relapse and how to break free of it is one of our primary missions at Jaywalker Lodge. We want to help men end chronic relapse and find lasting recovery. We succeed at this goal through a unique combination of services, treatments, methodologies, and approaches. All of these are placed upon the foundation of the 12-Step program of recovery. Beyond that, we employ the…

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Waiting to Be “Ready” for Recovery

ready for recovery

Most of us who are alcoholics or addicts may be wary of change, even if it means freedom from our deadly disease. We sadly get used to our lifestyle, no matter how destructive it may be. It’s a common malfunction among us that we cling to what we know, fearing anything different. Even though our disease is likely killing us, we still hold out hope that we can get it together ourselves somewhere down the road. It is very normal to fear what we do not understand, though it is also one of the more fruitless mindsets we human beings can hold. We don’t know what recovery will entail. We fear having to give up our lifestyle, our friends, our old familiar habits, and our ways of coping with life in exchange for a different life. Even if that life might be better, even if it means freedom, recovery, and…

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Can My Life Ever Really Get Back On Track?

getting back on track

Alcoholism and addiction affect our lives in so many ways. Some of those effects are similar. All of us who are alcoholics or addicts know the struggle with the mental obsession, the physical allergy, and the disease’s spiritual malady. It is these characteristic symptoms that bind all of us together in our common solution. This is part of what makes the 12-Steps work for all of us. Of course, there are also differences in the details of how alcoholism and addiction affect our lives. While we all have the same disease, our lives are certainly not the same. For some of us, our disease ruined relationships. For others, it prevented us from even starting relationships. For some, we lost our jobs or careers. Others of us never really got started. Broken homes, broken families, homelessness, couch-surfing — the variations of the fallout from our active disease are infinite because life…

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Men’s Issues: I Don’t Want To Look Weak


Nobody likes to look weak, and even worse is feeling weak. Culturally, men are trained to avoid any signs of weakness as best they can. Think about that for a second. The word fear isn’t used, but men are conditioned to fear weakness. Even more than that, we’re biologically wired to fear things we think are weak. Nobody can see us cry. No one must ever hear us ask for help. We can never let anyone challenge us, or “punk” us, or make us feel small. Because if any of that happened, we’d be weak. And weak men lose. Right? Not really. Mostly all of this is wrong. And I’m not talking about some reverse-psychology reframing of things to make them sound tough; I’m talking about actual strength. We don’t have a clear picture of that in society today. Male role models are typically superhero muscular, handsome, and wealthy. But…

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I Love an Alcoholic/Addict. What Can I Do About Their Problem?

my loved one is an addict

Alcoholism and addiction are a disease that affects much more than just the sufferer. This disease can cause pain and wreak havoc in the lives of all who are close to them. It can be excruciating to watch someone we love suffer from this devastating disease. Once they are controlled by their disease, the person we love can transform in heartbreaking ways. They may not resemble their normal self at all. It can be an incredible strain on any relationship, but this is especially true when it’s our significant other or spouse. We may love them with all our heart. Maybe we have been together for some time. But as alcoholism and addiction progress, they can drive us further and further apart, causing more and more pain. If you find yourself romantically involved with someone who is an alcoholic or addict, do not despair. Whatever type of relationship you have…

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Complacency in Recovery (and How to Avoid It)

avoiding complacency

Everybody loves to feel enthusiastic and excited about things. However, as alcoholics and addicts, we are warned to avoid overexposure to enthusiasm and excitement. We are told not to chase after these feelings because we can get hooked on intense feelings like those we got used to in our active disease. It can lead us to jeopardy when we overvalue the extreme up-and-down feelings. Extreme feelings are a topic all their own. But what about their opposite? Sometimes we can grow numb to feelings or get trapped in monotony. Or even worse, we can become complacent about our lives and lose any feelings for the beautiful life we have. Being complacent and feeling numb can be just as dangerous and detrimental as extreme feelings. Complacency often signals more than a few alarming things. It can mean we’ve lost our gratitude or lost sight of how far we’ve come from the…

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What Does ‘’Dependence on a Higher Power” Actually Look Like?

dependence on a higher power

Whether we are an alcoholic or addict, both, or neither, we’ve likely had some experience with the various styles of spirituality that people engage in. Whatever we believe or practice — or don’t believe and don’t practice — we are likely aware of many of the ways that people engage with the spiritual side of life. There are no right or wrong answers for our purposes here today. What we each believe is personal and private and wholly up to the individual. However, if you are an alcoholic or addict like us, you’ve obviously encountered the spiritual language in the 12-Steps of recovery and hopefully read what the literature of recovery has to say on the topic. If not, grab the book Alcoholics Anonymous and read the chapter titled “We Agnostics.” And now, let’s dive in. To Each Their Own Recovery does not demand any specifics or place any limits on…

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The Difference That Community Makes in Treatment

recovery community

It is usually apparent to anyone working in recovery that effective treatment for alcoholism and addiction should include some community elements. Even though this community model is typically obvious, its importance and the lasting positive effects it can have may be understated or even unconsidered. The difference and the contribution that community makes to lasting recovery should be regarded very highly indeed. At Jaywalker Lodge, we have a thriving recovery community built right into our treatment program. Jaywalker Lodge’s alumni often become so ingrained in this recovery network that they stay close after treatment officially ends to remain engaged and involved with this wonderful community. Alumni are also integrated into our weekly activities in the Jaywalker Lodge program. They frequently come together with our current members for family-style dinners, recovery meetings, and incredible service opportunities. These are really special because the current and former Jaywalkers come together to serve both the…

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Navigating Changes in Recovery

navigating change

Life can sometimes seem static. Maybe we’ve gotten ourselves into a rut. But for the most part, life is an ever-changing thing. It has waves and rhythms, but it’s always moving. It’s a fact of nature — change is the only constant. Things are living and growing, or they are getting stagnant and dying. Perhaps in our active disease, before we found the 12-Steps, we may well have been stagnant and dying. Luckily for alcoholics and addicts like us, now gratefully in recovery, we are on the path of constant growth. Our inner life, spirituality, and recovery must always be worked on and must always be growing to remain vital. That is why working the 12-Steps never ends. The program of recovery grows with us and should always be the focal point of our paths forward in this beautiful life. Though we always have the program of recovery to guide…

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How Do I Know If I Really Need Help?

needing help

Alcoholism and addiction are a disease unlike any other. They affect so much more than just the body, but the mind and spirit as well. Characterized by a three-fold nature, alcoholism and addiction are often deeply misunderstood, even by those who have the disease. Much can be done to understand alcoholism and addiction by reading the book Alcoholics Anonymous. For the most part, it is up to the sufferer to diagnose themselves with the disease. This requires both soul-searching and self-honesty. Only you really know if you have a problem. If you are having difficulty with substance abuse, alcohol dependency, or addiction, do your best to look within and be honest with yourself and those around you. If you think you may have a problem with alcoholism, addiction, or other substances or addictive behaviors, it is up to you to find a 12-Step program fellowship in your area that deals…

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